Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Ephesians 4:31

Let us look at the definitions of the terms found above. All definitions are taken from Webster’s Unabridged Dictionary.

Bitterness: root word; bitter suffix; ness: meaning the state of being bitter

Bitter: 1. sharp or biting to the taste; acrid.

2. sharp; cruel; severe; as bitter enmity.

3. caustic; reproachful; sarcastic; as, bitter words.

4. sharp to the feeling; piercing; painful; as, a bitter cold day, a bitter wind.

5. Painful to the mind; calamitous; poignant; as a bitter fate.

6. Mournful; distressing; expressive of misery; as, a bitter complaint.

Rage: from the root word, rabies, rage, madness, from rabere, to rave, to be mad.

1. insanity; amentia.

2. a furious uncontrolled anger; raving fury.

3. a great force, violence, or intensity, as of the wind.

4. strong emotion, enthusiasm, or desire.

Anger: 1. a strong feeling excited by a real or supposed injury: often accompanied by a desire to take vengeance, or to obtain satisfaction from the offending party; resentment; wrath; ire

2. the pain or smart of a sore or swelling: the original sense of the word.

3. inflammation of a sore or wound.

4. pain or trouble.

Brawl: a noisy quarrel; uproar; loud or angry contention

Slander: 1. the utterance or spreading of a false statement or statements, harmful to another’s character or reputation

Malice: 1. active ill will; wish to hurt others; spite

2. intent to commit an act which will result in harm to another person without justification.

Now, in the above verse, as well as in Colossians 3:8 and 1 Peter 2:1, we are instructed to totally rid ourselves of all of this. I know that I am guilty of all the above. Not always intentionally, but guilty none the less. Now, where do we being in eliminating these things in our life? We must first come to recognize them and their source. One of the things I learned about myself that really surprised me was that pride was nearly always, if not always, at the root of all these things. Pride said I had a right to be treated in such and such a way or that I deserved better and by golly you were going to learn to respect the way I wanted to be treated. Now, I am not saying that we are to be doormats, I am just saying we must guard in letting pride control what we say and do. Let us look at our relationships with people to see just where bitterness, rage, anger, malice, brawling and slander occur in our lives. We are going to begin this by listing those who have hurt us, what they did, how it felt, when it occurred, the circumstances surrounding the hurt, and what we did to make the situation either better or worse or what we did that might have contributed to its occurrence. None of us likes to admit that we have contributed to our own hurt, but we must look honestly and see if that is happening.

Take a piece of paper, making the columns as outlines here. Then, fill in the areas, being as honest as you are capable of being.

Upon finishing this listing, make sure you keep the papers on which you have done this inventory. Make sure you keep the record of all that you inventory. You are going to use these inventories later.

Now, in looking at the things you listed. How is bitterness, anger, rage, brawling, slander and malice being manifested in your life? Do you find evidence that they are there? As more harms come to mind, write them down. This will help you as you reach the point of being ready to become cleansed.

Father, help each of us to be honest and truthful about the things that we find as we journey through looking at how others have hurt us. In Jesus name, you give us strength to admit what we have done to contribute to the bad things in our lives. Help us to reach out to you, that we grow and recover from the many hurts that have come our way. We praise you that you have been with us as we have endured each and every hurt. Father, help each of us to feel our feelings, acknowledging them as real, even when they are not comfortable. Lord, in Jesus name, reveal to each that you have been hurt and are able to understand what it means to suffer. In Jesus name I praise you and thank you that there is hope and help in getting past these hurts, amen.