My name is Joe. I'd like to share with you my story of how, after completely screwing up my life for almost 40 years, I found Christ, or better yet, how  HE FOUND ME! 

I was born in March of 1959 in Brooklyn, NY, the son of Puerto Rican Immigrants.  My father moved to NY in the late 1940's.  My mother and him met in 1957, and later married in 1958.  It was the second marriage for each of them.  He had 6 previous children, she had one. 

I grew up in a family that really put the "fun" in "dysfunctional."
Incest was rampant and a well-accepted "short-coming" in my family.  Much of it wasn't voluntary incest.  As a matter of fact I would say that more than half of it was actually rape.  Fathers against daughters, uncles vs. nieces, cousins vs. cousins, etc.

The family was well into "espiritismo"; spiritualism and/or witchcraft.  Drugs and alcohol was a major part of my family's lifestyle.  I remember witnessing many adulterous affairs during my early childhood.  I imagine satan was having a beautiful time seeing how most of my family was a willing participant in the destruction  of our beloved family unit: Family members unremorseful of the emotional and physical pain they were voluntarily inflicting on the upcoming generation of the '60's.

My parents divorced in 1968 following numerous adulterous affairs on each other.  The pain of growing up in a family like mine just kept gnawing at my insides.  But like they say, "when it rains, it pours!"  In 1969 I became the victim of sexual abuse at the hand's of my sister's boyfriend.  I was 10 years old.  To this date I never told anyone.  I just added that to the luggage I was already carrying.

In 1971, at the age of 12, I was introduced to the world of drugs and alcohol.  I began to use and abuse marijuana, cocaine, and any other type of hallucinogenic I could get my hands on.  From "black beauties" to "acid".  From Quaaludes to paint thinner.  All the while I was introduced to the street life, hanging on the street corners and "gang-banging".  None of this could numb the pain I constantly felt. None of it could fill the void left in my life because of my family's wickedness.

I met a beautiful young lady in 1985 and we married one year later. She was everything  I ever wanted in a woman.  Beauty both inside and out, AND she LOVED ME!  She was a Christian girl; it seemed like God finally decided to show up in my life.  But then in 1995 all hell literally broke loose: Adultery; that generational curse that kept my family in bondage for God knows how many generations, came knocking at my door.  Since I didn't really have God in my life, I was easily snatched into its claws.  That vile curse that had destroyed dozens of couples in my family over generations, was now doing its work on my immediate family.

I succumbed to the temptations of the flesh and didn't look back.  I confessed it to my wife about a year later, but the pain I caused her was too much for her to bear and after3 years of never-ending agony, she threw me out of my home.  I lost her and my three children because of the weakness of my flesh.  I became despondent.  I had three unsuccessful attempted suicides.  I was hospitalized in a mental ward for my suicidal tendencies.  I was released once they "successfully" treated the symptoms, but they never cured the disease.  I began using drugs once again in 1998.  My use got worse as time went by without being able to return home.  I was gone for  6 months and still there was no hope of reconciliation.  The more hopeless I felt, the more drugs I used.  God and I were worlds apart. "After all," I said: "What has He ever done for me?"

I kept doing hard drugs until Jan 25, 1999.  Then on Jan. 26,1999  I checked into Robert Wood Johnson Hospital in New Brunswick, NJ where I underwent an elective surgical procedure.  Something 
went drastically wrong and I developed an infection.  This infection caused a condition known as "Septicemia" or in layman's terms, "Septic Shock".  As this infection spread, it settled in my brain, sending me into a coma. They tell me my heart stopped three times and both my lungs collapsed.  People often ask if I "saw the light"!  The answer is no!   No light.  What I did see was a vision.  In it I was walking down a street and I turned a corner.  What I saw may be disturbing to some and unbelievable to many.  I was in what appeared to be an alley.  In there I noticed people stuck in the ground; only the upper half of their torsos protruding from within.  I don't mean to sound judgmental or stereotypical, but they seemed dirty and their clothes were torn & ragged, like bums. 

There was much crying and tribulation here.  As I walked among them, some grabbed at my legs, begging for me to help them.  I was scared and confused.  I couldn't find a way out of this "Hell Hole".   Everywhere I turned was a dead end.  Suddenly, I felt someone touch me behind my left shoulder.  I turned to fend off the "possible attack".  As I did I heard a voice say to me: "Give me your hand and I will lead you out of here, for you don't belong here!"  As this was spoken I saw a hand appear.  Reluctantly, I reached out for the hand. Why, I don't know, but I let him pull me.  He led me around a corner and Glory be to GOD, I awoke from the coma that had held me captive for three months & four days. 

I don't need a degree to realize that I was in the jaws of Hell and it was Jesus Christ who snatched me from it!  For as it is written in Matthew 18:11(NKJV)  "For the Son of Man has come to save that which was lost!", He came to save me!  Praise be to GOD!  He's been so faithful to me.  Even the vicious snake that I was, not seeking Him nor actually acknowledging His existence!  Yet He still sought me and acknowledged my existence!  LORD, you're so Beautiful!  Since then I accepted Jesus Christ as my LORD and SAVIOUR.  He restored my marriage, which I had shredded to pieces due to my infidelity.  Then, to show me that He had only just begun His work in me, he restored me to perfect health, delivering me from the cane that the doctors' said would be a permanent part of my life due to the residual effects that the coma had done to my brain. 

All those years I was tricked by satan.  He led me to believe that God was a figment of people's imagination.  If He were real, He would have NEVER allowed all the pain that I endured!  But saints, THE DEVIL IS A LIAR!!!  The devil had an assignment to destroy my life and literally kill me, but God had other plans for me; His perfect will for my life!  I know my God is real.  I know that throughout all those years of pain and suffering, the only reason I was still alive was because He had His hand over me! He saved me for a higher calling. He saw me through ALL that pain so that I may one day testify, that God is a God of restoration.  That day is today, saints!  After all I endured, I am still here only by His grace!  Three failed suicide attempts, a rape, rampant & incessant criminal activity, numerous brushes with the law, drug & alcohol abuse, aggravated assaults against me, multiple possibly fatal accidents, a few attempts against my life, being declared clinically dead THREE times during that 1999 hospital stay.  Yet I am here today, a living testimony to God's enduring mercy and amazing grace!   Because of His love for ME, I am here shouting to the North, South, East, & West of His wonder-working power!  Hallelujah!  He kept me during the worst moments of my life; He delivered me from the claws of evil, He justified me in the eyes of the world, & will continue to show my family that I have survived not BECAUSE of, but IN SPITE of them!

My God! My God! My God!  How majestic is Your Name!  My Soul praises You now and forever more!  I will continue to lift up Your 
name, Lord, and proclaim that there is no other God.  There is none like You, Jesus!  I am eternally grateful to You.  YOU have called & qualified me to go to the world: The hurting, the sick, the destitute, the gang-banger, the drug-dealer, the homeless, the prostitute, the abused and the abusers, let's not forget the girl next door; and testify to them of what You have done for me so that they may find their hope in knowing what You are willing to do for them. Lord, order my steps, be a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.  In Jesus' name I pray.  Amen!

"You have hedged me behind and before and laid Your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, 
I cannot attain to it." Psalm 139:5-6


Brethren: Remember that our past is not there for us to dwell on; it is there as a reminder of what our God freed us of.  "If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed."  John 8:36 (KJV) It is not to be used as a crutch to lean on, nor as a weapon to sling at others, whether they were directly involved in our sufferings or in the sufferings of others.  It is to be used as an encouraging tool for others going through a storm.  We are to pray for those that hurt us.   We are to ask God to help bring these people into repentance, and that He show them the mercy and grace He bestowed upon us, for we are not sinless, we are forgiven.  If we choose to remember those that hurt us, how can we then expect to forget the pain we also inflicted on others?  When will be totally set free?  When we make the conscious decision to truly "forgive and forget".  We are to forgive the same way much has been forgiven to us.   If you still feel the need to cling to something; 

Cling to the Cross....

                                  
Remember, saints: His greatest promise is yet to come: "And God 
shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away." Revelations 21:4 (KJV) 



Your brother in Christ Jesus,
Joe Acosta